The ATV business is dying. It evenly divides people- some people are bummed out and some people applause. Those people are right to applaud. I work in the ATV business and fuck this place. They have it coming. They can all burn in hell. Burn these stores to the ground and salt the Earth so that nothing else may grow there.
It's very exciting working here because sometimes famous people come in. Can you imagine. One day, I was behind the counter and one of my co-workers came in laughing her ass off, tears streaming down her face. I said "Heather whats so funny?" and she replied, "Oh my god, me and my boyfriend were just at a stop light and I said what's so funny and he said look who's in the car next to us and I looked and it was Fabio!".
I said "So What? That's is a poor story, Heather. I guess you had to be there."
Couple of days go by. Standing there behind the counter. I don't recall what I was doing, hating myself probably. I looked up from the counter - there are these big glass doors at the entrance- and whom is walking through, but Fabio. And I fuckin cracked up. Because...
You are never ready to see Fabio.
Never.
There's no way you can be.
You can wake up that morning and say to yourself "I better be ready because I might see Fabio today. I better prepare myself."
That's when I realized, that's this guy's whole life. Everywhere he goes people just laugh in his face!
"Oh, I think Fabio's going to have fun at the party tonight! Maybe Fabio will make some new friends!"
Hahahahaha!! The very idea of him! He thinks he's a person!
"Oooohh Noooo! Do not laugh at Fabio! Puny human!! Fabio Smash!!"
The famousest people I ever met was the Smashing Pumpkins. We was at a signing party, well not really a party, but they was signing stuff. I brought the cd book for Adore, you know, the one that has the girl on the cover. Well James Iha drawed a beard and top hat on her so she looked like Lincoln. He said "sorry" to me but I was all like "james iha drawed on my cd book awesome!!!!! Weedly weedly wee!" and he went "silly person you don't have a guitar". Billy Corgan signed my cd book too, but he dint look at me cause he was too busy complaining about the music they was playin (it was Smashing Pumpkins). Later that year the band broke up. I hope I had somethin to do with it.
ReplyDeletehahahahahahaha I love both of those stories!
ReplyDelete